There is only one "The Gonz"

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This is The Gonz. There is only one and this is the one.

Recently I got an email from a sales rep referring to Globe's David Gonzalez as "The Gonz" or "Gonz." I was shocked and appalled. There is only one Gonz: Mark Gonzales. And he rides for Adidas, not Globe. I don't care if another skater someday goes pro by the name of Mark Gonzales, that skater also will never be The Gonz. Even if The Gonz has a son and names him The Gonz, that son will still fall short of ever being THE Gonz. So I put together a short list of past and present Gonzales' that are not The Gonz and why that is.

Rob Gonzalez
For starters Rob spells his last name with two Zs. The Gonz would never do that. The Gonz understands the power of Z overkill. If Mr. Long Beach were to ever ollie a groundbreaking gap that defined what all gaps must be measured against then that gap would have to be referred to as The Rob, since The Gonz gap is already taken.

Ben Karpinski

Rob Gonzalez nollie noseslides in Long Beach. Rob G is straight G but he is not The Gonz.

Courtesy of Getty Images

David Gonzalez, seen tailsliding here, is awesome but he ain't The Gonz.

David Gonzalez
David isn't from North America, so he can't possibly be The Gonz. Maybe he can be "The Gonz of Colombia (or T-GoC, for short)" but never The Gonz. Our The Gonz gets an afro when he grows his hair out whereas T-GoC has long, luxurious rocker hair. Also, as an artist The Gonz is known for misspellings in his writings and drawings but one thing he has never been accused of is mispronouncing his first name. There are no invisible letters or hidden accents in the name Mark. It is simply Mark.

Mark Gonzรกlez
This Chilean soccer sensation doesn't even skate. He wears Adidas but he doesn't skate. Clearly not The Gonz.

Danny Gonzalez
Despite having two z's in his last name, former pro Danny Gonzalez is probably the closest to being mistaken for The Gonz because they both rode for Deluxe companies for a short time when The Gonz rode for Real and Danny rode for the original incarnation of Stereo when it was under the Deluxe umbrella. Both have curly afros, too. But Danny has a penchant for running a moustache where I don't think Mark ever has (although I'd love to see him with a big funny, bushy cowboy moustache just once.) Another key difference is Danny Gonzalez retired from skateboarding last year. The Gonz can't retire (though he tried to once, moving to France for a while); he's eternal.

Adam Salo

The Gonz doing what he does. Fronside boardslide at the Maloof NYC contest, wearing an army jacket in 95 degree heat.

Danny Garcia
Perhaps one of the most confusing Gonzaleses in skate history is not a Gonzales at all but is often mistaken for one. Garcia is Latin American by heritage and a Danny which leads people to mistake him for Danny Gonzalez or Mark's guitar playing cousin (think Snoopy's cousin, Spike.). This confusion has led to Garcia getting requests for doodles and darkslides at nearly every demo and autograph signing he does. It has affected him so deeply, he wrote a sad song about it (Ed. Or maybe he didn't, but he definitely plays guitar: He rides for Habitat after all).

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